


The Truth Is A Terrible Thing

by DashFlintceschi



Series: Prompt Table [13]
Category: You Me At Six
Genre: Hallucinations, M/M, Max still has long hair because I stan long haired Max okay, Mental Health Issues, Unspecified Mental Illness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:34:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23856928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DashFlintceschi/pseuds/DashFlintceschi
Summary: Max talks to himself, but it's just a weird quirk of his, isn't it?
Relationships: Dan Flint/Max Helyer
Series: Prompt Table [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/510521
Kudos: 2





	The Truth Is A Terrible Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Number 17 - Mental Illness.

Max has always talked to himself, everyone who knows him knows that, it’s just part of him. He plays guitar, he makes dumb jokes, and he talks to himself. Josh jokes that it’s the only way Max can have a conversation with someone on his level; Dan reckons it’s just easier for him to order his thoughts when he thinks aloud; and Matt and Chris don’t care much either way, he’s happier doing it, and he’s not bothering anyone, so why should it matter.

When Dan notices Max carrying around a camera at the start of tour, he doesn’t think much of it, Max is always mumbling little observations about the world around him to himself, so Dan figures he’s just decided to record it and maybe post it online for their fans, like the tour videos they used to do, just from Max’s point of view. He actually thinks it’s an awesome idea, the more he thinks about it, and ends up filming little tour diary type videos of his own for Instagram. The fans love it, and Dan never does get around to thanking Max for the idea.

Josh almost notices something’s not right, two weeks into the tour, but ends up shrugging it off. He jumps when he hears Max’s voice behind him while he’s in the small kitchen area of their tour bus.

“What are you doing?” His voice isn’t all that loud, is almost timid, really, but Josh hadn’t known he was there and it startles him.

“Just making a sandwich, love, want one?” He asks, still slightly laughing at himself. Max just half glances towards him with a frown and shakes his head.

“Not you. What are you doing?” He asks again, his voice a little more demanding this time. Josh just assumes he’s interrupted a phone call and finishes making his sandwich, making sure to keep quiet this time so he doesn’t disturb him again.

There’s lots of little things like that all through the tour, they all notice them, but none of them put the pieces together. It’s so easy to shrug off odd little things without seeing the big picture. Chris barely has to think about it when he assumes Max’s disjointed, seemingly out of context comments when they’re playing Fifa is just him being frustrated and distracted. Matt easily laughs it off when he notices Max apparently having an argument with no-one in the middle of their set, he thinks out loud so often, it’s no surprise he’s started voicing all the great come-backs he hadn’t been able to think of during actual arguments. 

Dan isn’t surprised when he’s woken up one night by Max sitting up beside him in their bunk having what sounds like a pretty heartfelt conversation with no-one. Really, he’s more surprised Max hasn’t talked in his sleep before now, he thinks as he gently tugs Max into lying back down. Josh is surprised when Max barrels towards him and throws himself into his arms, shivering and muttering to himself as he clings to him. Josh just about manages to pick up a few words, ‘...huge guy with a knife…’ ‘...thought you were all dead…’ and his surprise fades as he sighs softly and runs his fingers through Max’s long hair.

“I thought we said no more naps after scary films, dummy.” He jokes lightly, but holds him tighter and lets Max cling as long as he needs to, eventually leading him to Dan and gently pushing him into his lap, he’s done most of the work, but he knows no-one can properly calm Max like Dan can.

Through all of this, the camera stays in Max’s hand, and that’s how they finally figure it out. A few days after they get home from tour, Max shuffles up to Dan nervously and hesitantly holds out a memory stick. Dan can’t help but frown as he takes it, he’s literally never seen Max like this. Even when Max had asked him out, he’d been his usual boisterous self over the clear nerves he’d been feeling.

“What’s this, love?” He asks as he tucks the stick into his jeans pocket, his other hand reaching up to give the loose bun at the base of Max’s skull a light tug. The familiar show of affection seems to relax him a little, and he’s a little less timid as he looks away and shrugs.

“Just some stuff I filmed on tour. Give it a watch and tell me if you see anything weird?” He asks softly, and Dan’s frown deepens, he wants to question his boyfriend on what weird stuff he should be looking for, and why Max thinks it’d be there, but he can tell Max will just close off and retreat if he does.

“Of course, babe. It okay if I get Josh to help me?” He asks, trying to keep his voice light and soothing, and Max shrugs, hesitates for a second, then slowly nods. Dan’s frown finally lessens as he relaxes a little, that’ll definitely make it easier. Since he has no idea what he’s supposed to be looking for, he knows his best bet is Josh, the best gamer of them all; i.e. has the best eye for spotting small details; and the one who understands Max’s brand of weird the best.

Less than an hour later, Dan and Josh settle down on the couch with a laptop settled between them. They make sure Max is still distracted in the garden with Harley before Dan plugs in the memory stick and opens the first file. It seems like nothing at first, Max sitting in an empty tour bus talking to himself like he always does. But after a few minutes, it becomes more obvious, Max isn’t talking to himself, he’s talking to Dan. Except Dan’s not there. 

They’ve just about convinced themselves it’s supposed to be a cute little video, Max talking to Dan through the camera knowing he’ll be watching later, but then the four of them climb onto the bus talking and laughing, and the camera quickly jerks between them and the empty section of couch a few times.

“But how did you…?” The timid, scared tone of Max’s voice breaks Dan’s heart, and for the first time, he starts to worry.

The file ends there and Dan’s fingers fumble in his rush to pull the next one up. Josh makes a soft noise and squeezes his forearm comfortingly, gently nudging Dan’s hand out of the way so he can do it for him. He’s just as worried about his best friend, but Dan’s worry has an understandable edge of panic to it, and the only way Josh knows how to help right now is to use his small amount of calm to do the little things Dan can’t manage.

The second clip is an instant wave of déjà vu for Josh as he sees himself standing on the bus making a sandwich. He has a whole new level of understanding of it now though as Max points the camera at the wall three feet to Josh’s left, his free hand reaching out as though he can’t quite believe what he’s seeing.

“What are you doing?” Max’s voice comes from behind the camera, just as small and timid as Josh remembers, and they can just about see him jump and turn at the very edge of the shot. Josh can’t figure out how he hadn’t known then that Max wasn’t talking to him, it’s so obvious Max doesn’t even really know Josh is there. They both know Max well enough that they can tell from the way he turns towards Josh and the camera almost seems to double take on him, that Max is really confused that Josh had replied to his question, but they’re still not sure what it means as Max brushes him off and turns to repeat his question to the blank wall.

“I thought he was on the phone,” Josh mumbles, feeling a little guilty about how casually he’d shrugged it off then. Dan sighs as the clip ends and the file closes, reaching out to pull Josh into his side and squeeze his shoulders.

“None of us realised what was going on. I didn’t realise something was wrong with my own boyfriend, do you think that’s my fault?” He asks softly, mostly to make a point, but there’s also a tiny part of him that needs the reassurance. He gets it immediately as Josh quickly shakes his head.

“Of course I fucking don’t, how could that ever be your fault?” He demands, and Dan just looks at him for a moment until Josh gets it. “Ah, yeah, good point.” He manages a weak smile, and they turn back to the laptop to play the next video, both feeling a little less guilty about the whole thing.

There’s thirteen videos in all, each of them just a few minutes long, showing the little stand-alone odd things they’d noticed from a different angle, from Max’s angle, and putting together a much clearer, and much more worrying bigger picture. Max comes back inside just as they finish the last video, and they both turn to him with scared eyes. He immediately drops his gaze to the floor and curls in on himself.

“You saw something weird on them?” He asks in a small voice, and Dan has to fight down the lump in his throat before he motions for Max to come sit on his other side. He does it reluctantly, and Dan pulls up the video that scared him the most, the one Josh had assumed was a nightmare at the time.

“Baby, what do you see here?” He asks gently, pausing it just as Max had started freaking out.

“Nothing now, but…” He trails off, and Dan pulls him close, Josh reaching over him to squeeze Max’s hand encouragingly. “At the time… A kind of… Animal, werewolf looking guy? Like fucking seven feet tall with this huge blood soaked knife. I thought he’d killed you all.” He finishes timidly, and Dan buries his face in Max’s hair as he takes a minute to fight back tears and compose himself.

“And all those times, all those videos, you thought someone was there, at the time?” He finally asks softly, and Max slowly nods, but doesn’t offer up any more information. He’s scared enough of what they’ll think of him without giving them the nitty-gritty details of it all.

They obviously don’t think any less of him, they’re both certain there’s nothing that could ever make them think less of him. But they’re naturally very scared for Max’s well being. He fights their pleas to see a doctor, still scared of what will happen, until Dan’s fear gets the better of him and he bursts into tears, and all Max is able to care about is making his tears stop as he pulls Dan into his arms and coos into his hair, promising to see a doctor as soon as he possibly can.

His promise helps, but all four of them are still on edge, hovering worriedly around Max as they nervously wait for the day of his doctor’s appointment. He and Dan leave three anxious messes fidgeting in the waiting room as they finally get to see the doctor, Max timid and halting and so very grateful to have Dan at his side as his boyfriend quietly supports and encourages him, stepping in to help when Max can’t answer a question or isn’t sure enough of what was real and what wasn’t.

It takes a while, a lot more appointments, a few psychiatrists, and trial and error of medications. But finally, a year later, Max feels a lot better. He still doesn’t always have a firm hold on what’s real and what isn’t, but those instances are fewer and further between, and he’s less scared when they do happen. And it takes a while longer for his bandmates to realise just how long they’d failed to notice that something wasn’t right, when Dan voices his sudden realisation that he hasn’t heard Max talking to himself for weeks.


End file.
